I haven’t been able to write for a few days as its been really busy. I find in these times that I can just about get my thoughts together, let alone then put them in some kind of blog post! Today has slowed down a bit and I feel a lot more on top of things, so thats good.

I’ve got a fun few days ahead of me. Louisa is going away for the weekend with the women from church. So its me and Joshua for the weekend! I can’t wait. We don’t spend a lot of time alone together so it will be cool. I’m sure it will also be a little stressful so remember me in your prayers

There was something Joshua does that everytime I think/see it it makes me smile. In our hallway we have two plugs. Obvioulsy to save electricity, when not in use we turn them off. Now, everyday when I come home Joshua has flicked them back on. So its now a daily ritual that I turn them off and then he turns them on again during the day. Such a simple thing, but it makes me smile. He is such a character, I love seeing him grow and doing new things and exploring too.

Had a good prayer time at our prayer meeting this morning. Really thinking about unity, and people living in the freedom Christ has purchased for us. One thing that came to mind the other day is that it is ok to be broken. I have often felt that there is an expectation that when you become a Christian that everything should now be fixed. The truth is that we still struggle, we still grow, we still heal. I was also praying for a few people along the lines of “we are more than conquerors”. I was provoked by it when reading John Piper’s book, “Don’t waste your life”, and how we don’t just have victory, but we are taking ground. I often have felt that i can be on the back foot as a Christian, feeling in the minority, lesser, the stranger. In some respects I am those things, but I am also the one who has the pearl of great price (not the mormon book). I am the one with eternal riches and an inheritance in Christ. If anyone should be on the back foot it is those who don’t know Christ. So today I’m about taking that ground and letting my light dispell the darkness.

I meant to write yesterday but it turned out to be a very busy day for many reasons. Towards the end of the day I realised how little I had trusted God for the things that had been going on. My tendancy is head down and get on with it, trying as hard as possible and hoping things come together. What I realised was that at no point did I come to rest in the soverignty of God. I don’t think that means I don’t work hard, try to do things etc, but that I am not anxious as to whether things work out. I think this is made harder when you want something to go a certain way, its harder to entrust God with that incase he has other things in mind!

I enjoyed my days off at the beginning of the week. It was an opportunity to spend time with Joshua, going to play groups and having some fun together (and giving Louisa a break). I managed to get a few things done around the house, although no where near as much as I originally planned. Perhaps a bit too much time was spent on the playstation, but I shouldn’t say that too loud otherwise Louisa will remind me of it next time i’m “wasting” time.

Tomorrow i’m off to help at church where we are demolishing the walls around the perimeter. Hopefully all this will go well and it will achieve its purpose of building better relationships between the church and the community. I will also get to bash some stuff so thats good!

I was thinking this morning about God’s grace and righteousness. I have also read how others have been thinking about this recently (maybe we should always be thinking on it!). I thought of this analogy to explain it:

Imagine you owed someone, somehow, £1,000,000,000,000. You have been told that you have a time to pay this debt back, but one day the debt will need to be paid. Now some will look at this and think they will never be able to pay it back, so why even bother. Some will work really hard to save money to pay it back. On the day the debt is due perhaps they have saved even £100,000,000. The trouble is that they is still way short of what is owed. The point is that no matter what you do, you will not be able to pay it. So the person you owe the money to comes to you and says, “I’ll give you that amount, and then you can just give it back to me”. Its a bit strange, why would someone pay of the debt with their own money?
This is what Jesus did. There was a price (standard of righteousness) that we would never be able to pay back. So he gave us the money (his righteousness) so that we could pay it off. People will try and try to pay back God but they can’t do it. It is only when we receive what He is offering that we can pay the debt so that we are free from His wrath on judgement day.

Enjoying my first day of holiday. It has been raining all day which has meant i’ve been inside for most of it. This morning I took Joshua to a musical play group. It was the first time i’ve been and was quite fun. It was quite a work out for me too! (I need to exercise more).

I’ve spent the afternoon doing bits around the house. Now I think it’s time to relax and enjoy myself, especially as I have a Trustee’s meeting this evening at church. Sorry I haven’t got much more fun stuff to write today, but wanted to keep the momentum going.

Today I am looking forward to a long weekend - a 5 day one to be precise. I have no plans as I hadn’t planned to take this time off, but had to take it rather than lose it. I like taking time off, I don’t know how it got to this! So I hope there will be some nice times of sleep, fun, and some more sleep over the next few days.

Tomorrow will be time for a hair cut (overdue) and then off to child protection training. This is at church where we learn how to adhere to policy and look after the kids well. I don’t do kids work, but am involved on a Trustee level. It should be an interesting time. There have been a few things that have come up recently that have got me thinking. Its hard sometimes to abide by laws (or best practise) when they seem to drain the last breathe from you. Things like this (and health and safety!) seem to do this all too well.

Reflecting a bit more on yesterday’s events, I got to thinking how Jesus challenged people in a way that didn’t seem to be there before him. He challenged us in a way that meant we couldn’t just act in a way that means we seem to do the right thing, that we behave appropriately. He challenged us in a way that hits deep down, that means we have to engage our hearts, and more often than not, change them. It sometimes easy to smile when there are 101 contrary thoughts going on in your head. Its harder to let your heart be exposed for spiritual surgery. The only reason I do so in the end is that I trust that it is ultimately for my good and for His glory.

Nearly forgot to continue my new trend. Sometimes you just don’t feel like writing either, this is one of those times.

I’m fuming right at this moment because of something at work. It will pass and just get pushed into the pot called office politics, but you know, I don’t go to work for this. I thank God for His provision of my job, I just wish He could provide for us in a different place sometimes. I’m not normally an angry person, but some people just get right to me, and its worse when they are so senior that they are untouchable. Better stop ranting now so I don’t say something I’ll regret.

Brain is blocked from thinking any happy thoughts right now, but looks like I will have Monday-Wednesday off next week as I have to take some of my holiday allocation before the end of the year. I’m looking forward to it!

*****

Edit - Not really calmed down, but I’ve been thinking. What I want to do is swear, slag off, moan, shout, punch. I don’t do that “because I’m a Chrisitian”. But does that mean that I just hold it all in? What do I do with this? “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” (Mt 5:44). Praying isn’t too hard. Loving is hard. Lord help me!

I was thinking about how I have entered into a blogging/thinking malise recently. I have been reading and enjoying other people’s blogs but really not putting any effort into blogging or challenging my own thinking. So I’m going to try and remedy this, hoping its not just a flash in the pan.

Today you can’t help but not reflect on the US Presidential election. It is strange to me how much focus it has gained from outside of the US, which I guess testifies to their global impact and importance (although it hurts to admit it). I don’t know if Obama will be good or not. So many Christians seem against him, mainly on the issue of abortion (another interesting note seeing as this issue has so little sway with voters in the UK). But it worries me how much focus this has taken off of Christ. I actually stopped reading one blog I previously enjoyed because it became so political instead of about Christ and family. I found the following article by Mark Driscoll interesting and gave a good perspective on it all (http://theresurgence.com/in_god_we_do_not_trust). When reading this it struck me how I hadn’t heard another about the election from Mark, and for this I was very grateful. I had heard a lot about Jesus.

Personally I have been quite challenged recently about my bible reading. I know my Bible ok, and have read it through at least once (probably a few times). But I feel I don’t really know it at all and that there are so many gaps. Not only that, but when I study I feel so much closer to God, I know Him more and my heart draws closer to His. It amazes me why I don’t ready/study more instead of wasting time of futile things. Pray for me that God will stir my heart even more into action to make His word my treasure.

One of the best things about being a Dad is, like today, when I phone up Louisa and Joshua realises it’s me (I do phone every day) and he starts shouting “Dadda!”. I love talking to him even though it can feel embarrassing when all your collegues hear you doing baby talk (that weird tone you put on when talking to babies). It is a wonderful feeling.

Salt is good for seasoning. But if it loses its flavor, how do you make it salty again? Flavorless salt is good neither for the soil nor for the manure pile. It is thrown away. (Lk 14:34-35)

Jesus wants salty people to follow him. He talks about being salt here just after he talks about considering the cost of following him and how we need to lay everything down. Perhaps he is saying that if we are not sold out then we are not salty, and if we are not salty then we are useless salt. Sounds harsh, but it makes sense. How often do we beg people to become Christians when infact they need to be ready to count the cost. Being sold out for Jesus is not easy and God needs to do a lot in our hearts. But when we are, we are like salt, we taste different and make a difference to the things around us.

“When the banquet was ready, he sent his servant to tell the guests, ‘Come, the banquet is ready.’ But they all began making excuses. One said, ‘I have just bought a field and must inspect it. Please excuse me.’ Another said, ‘I have just bought five pairs of oxen, and I want to try them out. Please excuse me.’ Another said, ‘I now have a wife, so I can’t come.’ ” (Luke 14:17-20)

What kind of excuses are these? Lame ones, thats for sure. What excuses do I make that stop from participating in the banquet of the Kingdom of God? Normally about being too busy, too tired, not enough time. If God is inviting me to His banquet then I need to make that my priority.

The world is not impressed when Christians get rich and say thanks to God. They are impressed when God is so satisfying that we give our riches away for Christ’s sake and count it gain

John Piper - Don’t waste your life

Other seed fell among thorns that shot up and choked out the tender blades … The thorny ground represents those who hear and accept the message, but all too quickly the message is crowded out by the cares and riches and pleasures of this life. And so they never grow into maturity. - Lk 8:7&14

I got thinking about this verse during our sermon yesterday and then it cropped (*cymbal*) up in my daily reading later in the evening. I was wondering whether many Christians today as content living in this state. Reading the verses implies to me that these are Christians, but immature ones. I hear people talk along the lines that stress our imperfection just a little too much, the fact that we are just trying to work it all out, that we shouldn’t be judging one another, and acting as if holiness and righteousness just aren’t that important - after all, we have Christ’s!

While I can agree with all of that, there gets to a point when it just feels like a cop out, and what it really boils down to is that we aren’t willing to be sacrificial and really lay down our lives before God. We aren’t perfect, we will fail, but that shouldn’t be an excuse. It shouldn’t stop me from desiring to be pure, to honour God with my body (including my mind). His grace is thankfully available, but I don’t think we should accept second best and just cruse through on grace.  Butis says of the seed that feel on good soil:

the good soil represents honest, good-hearted people who hear God’s message, cling to it, and steadily produce a huge harvest (v15)

I want to produce a good harvest! But this requires clinging, perserverance, commitment. But is brings maturity, it brings fruit. We shouldn’t be accepting anything less.

When Jesus was tempted by Satan he was offered a kingdom, but without a cross.

How much are we looking for a kingdom without a cross? victory without sacrifice?

Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few. (Mt 7:13-14 ESV)

Last year I posted an article on interesting teams for the 07/08 season. I don’t think I did too badly, although there were a few exceptions.

Manchester Utd did extremely well, playing with style for the most part they won the league and European Cup. Can’t ask for much more. Tottenham bombed at the beginning of the season, but had a small resurgence when they sacked Martin Jol and replaced him with spaniard Ramos. West Ham were my wild card and they were wildly off the mark. Sunderland did well, not expected to perform any miracle, Keano led them in a solid 1st season in the Premiership.

Outside of the Premiership, Charlton did nothing much and a few friends seemed to regret having a season ticket. Leeds nearly got promotion, but missed out at the last hurdle.

So what’s on for this season?

The battle for the top will be even more ferocious. Man Utd piped Chelsea on 2 fronts and the Blues will want their revenge under new boss Scolari. Man Utd look stronger than before, although I am concerned whether the Ronaldo transfer-saga will have any unsettling effect on the team.

Tottenham look interesting again with a few new players coming in and others going out, but I don’t expect much from a team still in transition - they will probably get a top 8 finish.

Sunderland have taken a few Tottenham reserves, so I don’t see them doing anything better than Spurs. They have signed a couple of more creative players in Diouf and Malbranque, so there could be a few more interesting times for them, not so much grinding out results.

New boys Hull may be an interesting watch. No stars to speak of, but great team spirit. The fairytale could continue for them with a meteoric rise up the Premiership, but I doubt it.

There feels a lot more unknown this season - whether the Man City revolution continue under Mark Hughes, whether Paul Ince can stick it at the top level, whether Roy Hodgson was a flash in the plan to save Fulham last season and whether he will be a Lawrie Sanchez II and have a dismal second season.

In summary, I don’t expect the top 4 to change one bit - Man Utd, Chelsea, Arsenal & Liverpool (in that order). Going down, Stoke, Hull and an outside bet at Middlesbrough (sorry Mike J). Normal service should return in the FA Cup too with a top 4 team winning. I think we will see another strong season from English teams in the European Cup too, but I wonder if Inter Milan (under the Special One) will snatch it away.

I can’t wait. And, despite self-perputating rumouors, it seems I will make a return for the mighty Ramsden this season (or whatever they are called now) and expect promotion from the Bromley & Croydon Christian League Third Division - it doesn’t get any bigger. 

 I am willing to endure anything if it will bring salvation and eternal glory in Christ Jesus to those God has chosen. (2 Tim 2:10)

What an attitude to have! So often we only want to serve God when it’s easy, when it suits us. Paul (the author of Timothy) went through so much, and at this time it appears he may be imprisoned. But he has a greater purpose than his own well-being. Will we endure anything in order to bring glory to God? I want to have that heart and mind so that when hard things come my way I will be able to turn it for His glory.

If we die with him, we will also live with him. If we endure hardship, we will reign with him. If we deny him, he will deny us.  If we are unfaithful, he remains faithful, for he cannot deny who he is. (2 Tim 2:11-13)

For a while I have thought about the implications of going into full-time ministry. One of the issues for me was that it could feel like a cop-out, that I would be working with people, preaching to them, and they were “out in the world” whereas I would be in a little Christian bubble. Its felt too easy to tell others how to live when I wasn’t having to live the same way.

It got me thinking today though, as I listened to a John Piper sermon, that here was a man who was a full time minister (”out of the world”) and someone who encouraged people to serve God, follow God, glorify God. I felt encouraged by his sermon and wondered whether it is appointed to some to fulfill this role, to be able to so focussed on God so that they can encourage, challenge, teach others who, by the natural order of life, can more easily get distracted, lose sight of the goal, take their eyes off Christ. I am continuing to recognise its just about roles, and one of those roles is to be devoted to a level of study, of prayer, of care that others can not be. One is not lesser or greater than the other, they are roles that complement each other.